Wednesday, August 02, 2006

Mind the gap

I'm in London, riding the Underground, the Tube, with my friend Carl. We get off at our station, and I hear The Voice. It's a deep, well-modulated, masculine Voice. It slowly and distinctly enunciates three words: "Mind the gap." Over and over again. "Mind the gap. Mind the gap. Mind the gap."

What does it mean? I understand each word. Mind. The. Gap. Each makes perfect sense on its own. Together they bewilder me. Is it some sort of bizarre advertisement for a clothing store? That makes no sense. I look around. All the other people are going about their business, hurrying or strolling to wherever they're going. None of them seems to be listening to The Voice. Am I the only one who can hear it? Is it the Voice of God? Is He trying to tell me something, but I'm too unworthy to understand His message? Am I hallucinating? Finally, I look at Carl. "What the hell is that?" he says.

"You hear it too?" I say. "I was a little worried there for a minute."

8 comments:

  1. The gap between the train and the platform...

    ReplyDelete
  2. In disagreement. "Mind the gap" clearly refers to something else.

    My thighs happen to not quite touch at the top. Sometimes, I wear things to draw attention to it. I could just as easily carry a megaphone and instruct people to "mind the gap."

    ReplyDelete
  3. Tax,
    We did figure it out. Eventually.

    Mist1,
    Remember though, we were in England. Most women there would be better advised to carry megaphones and instruct people "Don't look at my thighs."

    ReplyDelete
  4. I spend much of my time trying to convince people to look at my thighs. I've never said, "Don't look at my thighs."

    What does that mean in American?

    ReplyDelete
  5. Mist1,
    That's because you (apparently) have look-worthy thighs.

    ReplyDelete
  6. It's my treadmill workout.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Oh Mist1, gaps happen sometimes when your legs are so skinny as to cause a gap. Other reasons may be because you like to ride horses. The final reason is that you look like Beyonce'. Which one is it girlfriend???

    Didn't mean to crush on your blogger flirt :)

    ReplyDelete
  8. 1. Was not flirting (bats lashes)
    2. Legs are "lean" not skinny
    3. Love horses
    4. Beyonce is a Goddess

    (end post hijack)

    ReplyDelete

What do you think?