Thursday, May 03, 2007

Mr. Free-Love Religion meets the Law of Chastity

Back when I lived in Tokyo, very odd people would sometimes show up at my (LDS) church. One of the most unusual was a guy in his late 20s who was trying to start his own religion. For some reason, he apparently thought that an LDS church would be fertile ground for recruiting.

Since he wasn't a member of the church, it generally fell to the missionaries to talk with him. For example, one Sunday he showed up with an armful of books on theology and announced that he'd like to debate the bishop over the pulpit. The missionaries gently explained that that wasn't our custom. No one I talked to seemed really clear on the details of the guy's new religion, but apparently "free love" was a big part of it. That was the part all the missionaries seemed to remember, anyway.

On another Sunday, Mr. Free-Love Religion showed up, but he wasn't alone. He was accompanied by one of the most beautiful young women I've ever seen. She was absolutely gorgeous. (In fact, I only ever met one woman in Japan that I ever thought was a little better looking.) They waltzed into church just as the Sacrament Meeting (the main portion of LDS Sunday meetings) was about to begin and took a seat near the front. (Visitors are quite welcome at Mormon services; it's debating from the pulpit that's frowned on.)

Well, the theme for the talks (sermons) that week happened to be "The Law of Chastity." Remember now, the guy was sitting near the front, so he couldn't inconspicuously slip out. Nor was that really an option for him. It would have made him look bad, like he couldn't handle the heat of the preaching. So for the next hour and ten minutes or so, Mr. Free-Love Religion got to sit next to his drop-dead gorgeous recruit and squirm as speaker after speaker explained why sex outside of marriage is bad and an affront to God, society, and all decent-minded people.

As soon as the meeting ended, the missionaries, as is the wont of LDS missionaries everywhere, hurried over to speak with him and his beautiful companion and invite the two of them to stay for Sunday School as well. The young lady seemed quite interested; apparently she was all for finding out more about The Law of Chastity. But Mr. Free-Love Religion seemed a bit agitated. He said they had to leave right away because they had an urgent appointment. He ignored the puzzled look on the young woman's face and rushed her out of the building. Oddly enough, he never came back after that.

3 comments:

  1. Are you by any chance a fan of Dashboard Confession?

    ReplyDelete

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