Wednesday, September 07, 2011

Bible quote of the week: "There she lusted after her lovers, whose genitals were like those of donkeys..."

Bible quote of the week brings you the wit and wisdom of Bronze Age and Iron Age barbarians God's Word. This week:

Ezekiel 23:19-20 (NIV)
19 Yet she became more and more promiscuous as she recalled the days of her youth, when she was a prostitute in Egypt.
20 There she lusted after her lovers, whose genitals were like those of donkeys and whose emission was like that of horses.

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  1. Great memory verse...or Valentine's card...or wall plaque. What a wonderful book for children! Oh, I've got it--I'll stitch it on a pillow. :)

  2. That'd make a great piece of needlework lol. What I'm wondering is how the author knew what a horse's "emission" is like.

  3. Sex with animals was apparently a thing for them.

    I remember reading about the rule against women having sex with dogs in Leviticus, and thinking, "Was that a problem?"

    And feeling weird and confused.

  4. Pretty much all the sex parts of Leviticus were like that for me. I was always like "Wait -- they had to be told not to do that?"

    And every once in awhile they'd throw in a "Don't be like the filthy Canaanites and do this stuff," like that was fooling anybody.

  5. A while back, Landover Baptist Church (a parody website) had a calendar filled with bizarre Bible quotes like this. The point, it seems, was that the Bible has some very strange, violent, gross, and downright dissonent content.

  6. I have some more lined up.


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